cramps corner!

Don't think I forgot!!!! It's time for more Cramps Corner - in which I get to bitch and complain as my ovaries twist themselves up in pain and make me want to cry for Jesus. I feel like absolute shit today and can barely see straight. I also probably should not have consumed bacon fried rice AND Indian food for lunch, but whatever whatever, I do what I want!

Things on my mind today:

1. I am a fucking emotional wreck. A WRECK! Yesterday, I watched Glee and cried like a baby. I mean, most people I know cried during the episode, but I broke down and bawled. You would've thought they were killing my child or something when I watched this show. I like to think it was a hormonal thing, but I don't know. After the show I looked at myself in the mirror and my eyes were puffy and red and I looked like a hot ass mess. Over a TV show. God, being a woman sucks. Seriously - men need to go through something this shitty each month so we can be even.
2. You know what else sucks. Exes. Exes suck. TG is back from his trip and I hate it because now he's all here and I have to see his tweets and wonder what he's doing. I hate that I can't seem to just get over this, even though I'm dating a guy I really like. I think I just need to get laid. Penis cures everything. I wish I could get a doctor to write me a prescription for it because I'm always happy after sex, even lackluster sex. I want a manservant who has to pleasure me whenever I desire it. Wahhh. Okay, I'm done being whiny.
3. I really want to text The Blexican, but don't know what to say. I want to say something suggestive or sexy or racy, but in general I just kind of want to talk to him. Which upsets me because I hate wanting to talk to people. It exposes my weakness and vulnerability. Hate it.
4. As much as I hate my period, I'm so happy it came today! I get so worried when I have questionable sex (meaning sex with someone I barely know or who has some kind of sketchball quality about them). I'm always like - what if something happens and I'm pregnant with this crazy baby. All month I kept picturing mini versions of The Russian. I don't think I'd be allowed to kick a baby in the face - that would be bad right. But, anyways, crisis averted! I am not preggers! Time to return to my regular programming =)

Okay, I'm done bitching and whining. Back to work!