broke my bay to breakers virginity!

Sorry for not updating yesterday, but I was hungover and miserable after Bay to Breakers, as was most of the office. It was amusing to walk around and see everyone looking cracked out and tired. OMG I love San Francisco! Seriously - it's a really wild and crazy city, full of fun, open people and I love it! I typically tend to be kind of Oscar the Grouch-like when it comes to festivals and crowds, but I think SF is wearing me down.

I popped up bright and early at 7am. I live on the race route, so there were already people camped out, including a dude with a guitar. I got myself all dressed up - hot pink wig, pink angel wings, a pink garland in my (fake) hair, and hot pink tights with a pink mini skirt. I also slutted it up a bit with a hot pink push up bra, underneath a sheer white t-shirt, but I was modest and buttoned it up. Life Coach and her BF came to pick me up and we headed to Alamo Square, where we proceeded to get shitfaced on vodka-Gatorades and whiskey-lemonades. We met up with her boyfriend's friends who were crazy and a ton of fun. I greatly enjoyed seeing full-frontal male nudity, although most of it was attached to men old enough to be my grandfather. I also saw more cock rings than I've ever seen in my life. Throughout the day, the guys kept trying to get me to flash them because my boobs are awesome, but I'm a lady so I declined. We started drinking every time we saw a naked person and I was wasted by 9:45am. It was fucking amazing!

Of course, because I'm me, I started flirting with one of the guys there - we'll call him FBI because that's where he works. He is tall and muscular, with dark features and facial hair, which is totally my type. He started chatting with me and he lives in NYC, so we bonded about that. After watching every single group go by, the police sweepers came through, so we moved the party to my place, where I flirted with FBI some more, and also did an assessment of his personality - favorite books, favorite places to go out, etc. I also may have dared him to pee out of my window, but he didn't, so I think that's a good thing. After that, Life Coach and her bf left, so I was basically alone in my house with their friends. It was an interesting assortment of people - there was a married dude with four daughters (!!!). He was the most vocal about me taking my top off, not sure how I felt about that. Then FBI, and then Life Coach's boyfriend's brother and his girlfriend. There was also a 50 year old couple there - FBI's ex-girlfriend's mom and her boyfriend. So um yeah, not your average hangout. 

So this motley crew ended up going to Kezar pub and drinking more - Jameson on ice for me, so I could keep up with FBI. You all know how I get when I drink with boys, it's like I have to prove myself. So basically, homeboy kept flirting with me the entire time and all day he'd been telling me that I need to get together with him when I'm in NYC. While at the bar, he got my number and then texted me his, so the plan is to contact him when I'm NYC and see what's up. He seems like a total manwhore, but I wouldn't mind getting laid, especially by an FBI agent. I've been keeping it really hush-hush with Life Coach, since it's her BF's best friend and I don't want it to be weird. I also am like 95% sure that he will forget me and be like 'who is this chick texting me?'

I think it's been so long since I've had physical contact that I just need to screw someone. The whole day I was so on edge, especially since FBI was being crazy touchy-feely and all over me. I swear, if I don't sleep with someone during my Providence-NYC-Wedding Weekend, I will kill people.